Our dog woke us up this morning around 4:15, barking hysterically in the kitchen. I got out of bed in my shorts to quiet her down. Jacqueline was freaked out but I wasn't worried because I'm a man and we men know that there's never really an intruder in the house, (thats why we're always so willing to go check on it). So I'm walking down the hall trying to adjust my eyes to the light when I see him, the dude in my laundry room.
The laundry room is separated from the kitchen by a glass pane wooden door with a dog flap at the bottom, which this guy was sticking his head through. The door was locked, but the frame has warped with the humidity and now will not fully shut. He didn't know that yet.
The guy starts to yell at me about someone trying to kill him and that he was being shot at. He wanted me to unlock the door and let him in. By this time, Jacqueline was standing in the hall behind me. I told her to go get "that thing" which was my new code word for the gun in the night stand. Now the guy is back on his feet and pushes on the door which instantly opens for him. joy. I push it back and tell him to stay in the laundry room. By this point, I'm not sure wether he's the threat or if there's someone else in the yard or street with a gun or if he has a gun.
I snatch the phone and dial 911 as I dash to the bedroom and grab my gun, (Smith & Wesson 38 special, thanks grandpa) and head back to the kitchen where the dude is trying to come in the door again. I point the gun at him and tell him to back up into the laundry room. This was WAY more exciting than I imagined, like...roller-coaster exciting.
By now, I've told the 911 dispatch the situation and my address and start asking the guy questions (at gun point) about where he came from and who was chasing him. The cops where here in about four or five minutes and for some reason were not aware that the guy was in my house. I put my gun down when I heard the officer come in the door and he walked into the kitchen. He instantly drew his gun on the intruder and started yelling at him, again, very exciting. At this point I returned to my bedroom and put some clothes on.
They take the guy out on my porch and start to question him. He said that someone was chasing him and shooting at him. The officer told me that he had been parked close by for over 30 minutes and never heard a thing. Then they realize they guy has a warrant. Next they discover that he thinks he's in California. That's right, the guy is B A N A N A S.
For some reason, he hid all the stuff in his pockets behind my washing machine. A pack of smokes, his wallet, a cell phone and a piece of paper with the Salvation Army's address on it (a block from my house). Why would anyone take the time to do that if they were running for their life? Weird. They end up taking him to the hospital to check him for drugs and have him evaluated for a case of the crazies. I'll be checking the Washington county arrest site tomorrow to see if he was charged with anything.
I'll surely never check on a noise without a gun in hand again.
I'll surely never check on a noise without a gun in hand again.
I hope this blog entry makes sense, I'm really tired and its 5:47 in the morning.
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